yaad watan ki mitti

i guess this is one of the nostalgic moments in my life which are rare..like big boys dont cry..big girls dunt cry either..lolsss. i ve habit of editing, re editing and going nip snip snip on my blogs. I ve always been quite attached to the idea of writing a diary since i ve been a kid but somehow i ve not associated very good memories on the storage of those diaries which eventually led me to stop writing them. I bought myself all the strength i could muster to start writing a blog which could be my alternative to writing my diary but i handed out the address of my blog to my frnds and at times i dont feel comfortable exposing my feelings, maybe its that weird feeling where you are letting your guard down and gets you uncomfortable.Why is it so difficult to open up?? or just to be urself?? wat is so mentally restricting which prevents me to rite things which are weird maybe and at times they dnt even make sense,the sentences are not even fugue which the psychoanalyst talks about..but i wish i could be a counselor myself..hush so many wishes..so many uncertainties. Thats the fun of riting something so abstract like this..like an abstract art,this is my abstract article..and in the back ground i think of my friend if he would ve been around, would ve given me some philisophical advice of how mad i am and how idiotic i do some things though i dunt come across as someone who would do that.. i miss u,,..i really do