Trapped

I like to read,started my reading adventure with Enid Blyton-The magical tree,classics by oscar wilde.Have read since i was 10 yrs old.Dunt know if am an avid reader or voracious or both.I laughed my heart out after reading Chetan Bhagats 5 point someone.Saw his new book in my newsletter from a book store,its callled 52 states.While talking to a dear friend of mine i mentioned that i am looking forward to reading that book to which he snapped saying he never approved of chetan bhagats writing style,...hmmmmmmmm i went and i decided not to pursue my chetan bhagat book list any further.I dunt know why i did that. Shouldnt I value my opinion!!

Every week after the winning bingo numbers flash on our TV screen i dutifully spend atleast half an hour planning on how i would love to splurge the monies, and I get a massive kick out of it. Every nod, every approval, every action is either related to some preset approved mindset either created by me or presented to me but i have made that choice. I feel like a moth caught in the web of its own shell but am not sure if am the moth or the butterfly. If am trapped in my own life decisions or am free after making those decisions. Trapped in my own desires, my needs, my wants, my pursuit of the right life, the right habitat with the right surrounding and the right people. Is it really freedom for me or am trapped in me?????????

weakness

when i was young and it was time for me to choose my career Genetics was something that i found the most interesting... "Dolly" the first clone..mutations...genomes..DNA...that was my mystical magical world.dunt really know if that would ve been right choice for me or this is..

But somehow the concept of Clones has not left my pea brains yet..Identical clone who would look exactly like you..would have the exact composition as every cell in your body is fascinating..as they say..with power comes responsibility...For that clone to ve the exact same composition as ur mind is an impossible feat. The very mind we makes each of us different in some way is the result of the varied experience we go through..the enormous turbulence in our lives due to the smallest inevitable change to the devastating calm that gets us after the biggest loss in our lives..all of it makes us what we re,..every layer of mystery..engima and crazy that we think we are..

One question always comes to mind..why are we so scared of being ourselves?? we just treasure it..we preserve it..not sharing our thoughts...being as clandestine as we can..what are we thinking?????? Keeping our thoughts to ourselves...not sharing us with others..i guess thats a thought i will try and decipher before its too late for me to mend